Eric and Lisa

At the same time that Eric and I were reading Jean Twenge's book entittled Generation Me (see our previous blog), I was also reading Max Lucado's devotional-style book, It's Not About Me: Rescue from the Life We Thought Would Make Us Happy. The juxtaposition of the two books was striking. One discussed the current trend of our generation to focus inward and attempt to achieve happiness through self-preservation tactics -- an attitude that has caused (in Twenge's point of view) record highs of depression, anxiety, and laziness. The other book described the attitude and focus that we should have -- that of focusing on God instead of ourselves. Max Lucado posits that if we could see that our bodies, our talents, our successes, and even our struggles are all for God's glory instead of our own, we would then find the true source of contentment and happiness in life. In God's system, we are definitely appreciated, valued, and loved, but we are not central or pivotal to his overall plan. Important? Yes. Essential? No. There is a difference there that "GenMe-ers" don't often get. We have been taught from Day One (by our parents, our school teachers, etc.) that we are invaluable and intrinsically special. While that is not necessarily false, it's also not necessarily the correct perception of ourselves. Taken too far, it can breed narcissism, an extremely unhealthily high opinion of one's self. According to Twenge, there is no data that shows that high self-esteem creates a good, hardworking and happy person. Lucado takes it one step further and suggests that turning our attention toward the holiness and specialness of God (rather than ourselves) and attempting to live our lives in such a way that we display and honor His character will give us a life filled with more happiness and contentment than we could ever dream. With that attitude, we can work hard and be productive and respectful not for our own glory, but for God's, which will lead to a much more satisfied life.

This whole experience with reading these books has (obviously) made us think, especially now that we're parents and we so desparately want to raise a child who is compassionate, hard-working, respectful, and honest. How does one instill such characteristics in a person? We think the biggest source of information for Ian will be by our own example. We're going to really try -- with God's help -- to be these things so that our children will see God, not us. After all, it's not about me.